One of Those Days

Last Friday was one of those days. You know the kind where you have to keep laughing so you don't cry. The kind where you wonder "what next?" but are too afraid to actually ask. Where you want to go back to bed and start over...or just stay in bed.

Friday morning the kids and I rush out the door in hopes that we would somehow be able to gain back the two minutes we needed in order to NOT be late for school. We weren't far from our house when it suddenly started raining...or we drove through sprinklers...or a flock of birds just pooped all over our car. Yea, that was it. Bird poop. Sadly, I didn't realize it was not rain, or the sprinklers until after I turned on the windshield wipers.

When I finished gagging, I resumed my task of getting Summer to school on time. Only now I was doing it by peering through streaks of bird poop all over the windshield. I wish I was exaggerating.

In spite of the bird poop, we actually made up our two minutes, but now there was no way I was driving my poopmobile through the car line. So we parked, got out and walked away from the car as quickly as possible.

Once she is in, I came back to check out the damage. Never before have I seen so much poop. With two fingers I attempted to open my door between splats. Needless to say, we headed straight to the car wash.

An experience in and of itself with two kids in the car and a mom who has never done this before...but I will spare you those details. We make it out with a clean car! It has never felt so good! Next stop - grocery store.

I have to admit as I turned off the car and walked around to get my kids out, I was a bit nervous at what this trip would bring. I will tell you, it was not what I expected, and it would be mere second before I would find that out...

Connor jumped out of the car and pulled out his shorts to look down them with wide eyes, "Where did my underwear go?"

I stopped in my tracks and asked, "Connor, do you not have underwear on??" while praying he was playing a trick on me.

"I guess I forgot them." He said much too seriously.

I looked for myself. Yep, he forgot them...somehow. I cringed but put him in the cart anyway. "Let,s just get our groceries quickly and then I will take you home to get underwear, OK?"

"OK" he replies and go we about our shopping trip.

Until I walk in and realize that in my hurry this morning, my shopping list was left on the counter right by my purse...instead of in my purse. Still determined to go home with food, I try to do it by memory.

Three aisles in my phone rings. It is Summer's teacher. I had wrote a note to her that morning concerning a note that came home from school with Summer the night before. Summer had found a note in her cubby that read, "I love you Summer! From your sekrit idmyudr." And then a second one that read, "I love you so much I want to kiss you!" Needless to say, that is where we got concerned.

So there I am explaining the whole situation in the middle of the store, while trying to pull my grocery list from head, push a race car grocery cart and keep two kids seated and under control. In all that, I completely forgot one of them didn't have on underwear. Unfortunately, he didn't forget....

I finally reached the check-out and and the man bagging the groceries (who we see there nearly every visit, I might add) asked Connor how he was doing today. I wasn't really paying attention until I heard Connor's response. "I don't have any underwear on."

I quickly covered his mouth, but it was too late. I felt my face turn red, but oh, it wasn't near over.

The man responded loudly "No, underwear on? Why don't you have any underwear on?"

Connor explained as best he knew how, "I guess they stuck to my pjs when I got dressed this morning and I put them in the laundry."

"Were they clean underwear?" The man asked.

Connor nodded a yes.

"Oh, no, OH NO!" the man exclaimed, his voice grew louder and louder as my face got redder and redder. "You never put clean underwear in the laundry, do you know why?"

Connor wide-eyed, shook his head.

"Because then you end up at the grocery store WITH NO UNDERWEAR ON!"

My gratitude at him declaring yet again to the people all around me that my son didn't have any underwear on was displayed well on my crimson face.

At last the cashier handed me the receipt and I grabbed my cart and pushed it out of the store.

Connor wondered aloud, "Why didn't he come out to the car with us like he always does?"

I muttered more to myself than to him, "He was probably afraid."

"Oh. I shouldn't have told him I didn't have underwear on." He says as if a light bulb just went off.

"Probably not", I said.

But it was done and we were headed home...yet even after all that, the day was just beginning...